The Reason For This Season

That's right! Nothing makes me happier than the advent of Halloween and the re-stocking of Boo-Berry, Frankenberry and Count Chocula cereals. I don't even care that Halloween is a month and a half away, and that this is a shameless ploy for consumers to spend more money based on fond memories. (Unlike the Christmas display I saw in Costco the other day. There should be a moratorium on selling holiday paraphernalia more than a month in advance of said holiday.)



Ah, the old days. I spent every summer at my grandparents, running wild in the logging camps where my grandpa worked. Every few weeks we'd come back down the mountain to stock up on supplies. Grandma was great because she let us eat pretty much whatever we desired, as opposed to Mom and her so-called "healthy" breakfast cuisine. There is only so much oatmeal, cream o' wheat, eggs and pancakes one can take before the soul just cries out for some sugar coated compressed cereal compound. We would drive out to Goose Creek (pronounced "crick" to you philistines) General Store (900 square feet of love), where we would bask in the neon glow of the monster cereal boxes. My brother and I got to pick out our own boxes, so there was no bickering or jealousy to be had. Paradise, I tell you! Sadly, the monster cereals were discontinued when I was 10 or so. Rain fell in my soul and life became bereft of joy. But now! Now, I get to relieve my childhood once a year with a plethora crappy breakfast cereal that turns your milk different colors and treats you to a flood of insulin after the first spoonful. Thereby guaranteeing you spend the rest of the day in a stupor.