I've been a little busy lately.  Work has been hectic, including an emergency c-section first thing in the morning.  I live for that shit.  I think my dream job (aside from flight nurse...11 more years, baby!) would be an obstetric ICU.  Way cool!  But, I digress.   It's been spring break (why are these children never in school?), which means all the errands that I would normally do that requires no tag-a-longs (for my sanity most of the time) had to be postponed or rearranged.  I haven't even been able to keep up with all my blog reading and my Google reader is about to explode from overload.  Now some people have been incredibly remiss in posting, and the poor little blogs are weeping uncontrollably at being orphaned in such a rash manner.  But, we should give him a break as he may be a little overwhelmed adjusting to his new life direction.  And I would just like to say everything I've ever said is just as true now as the day I said it.  Why people insist on arguing with The All Knowing is beyond me. 

Friday was my BFF's (not THAT one!  This one is human and doesn't require batteries) birthday,  so we dumped the kids in daycare and went to see Hot Tub Time Machine.  We haven't seen a  movie without kids in tow since Superbad.  And actually, we had her 21 year old with us.  He may be an adult, but he's still our kid, so it counts.  It was pretty funny...for those of us who could relate.  The main characters were 19 in 1986 and so was I.  The little punks in the front row who aren't even 19 now, couldn't possible have enjoyed it to any extent.  Afterward we went to Panera Bread for lunch.  Holy crap, that place is crack to me.  Which is why I avoid it like the plague.

In the 14 seconds that the monsoon actually stopped today, I mowed the lawn.  Nothing like mowing soaking wet grass and seeing your breath.  You should not see your breath condensate while you are mowing the grass. There is just something so fundamentally wrong about that.  Psycho weather.   I had to get gas for the mower and while at Costco, saw a guy that had to be a transplant.  Baggy, silky gym shorts, skinny legs, a NY Yankees sweatshirt and CROCS!  Ewwwww.... He obviously doesn't know that the Pac NW uniform is denim shorts, a Mariners/Seahawks sweatshirt (Yankees.  Blegh.), socks and Tevas/Keens/Birks.    What a fool.

I'm not exactly sure what my problem is with decorating during religious holidays, but I get so irritated.  The kids aren't allowed any where near the living room during Christmas until the lights are on the tree because I'm a snarling bitch while I  string them, and I don't want them even breathing while I'm getting the dye ready for Easter eggs.  Let's all celebrate peace, love, and Christ-like tendencies while mom yells and bites our heads off!  W00T! 
Here are the boys dyeing their eggs:

These children take any excuse they can to strip down to their skivvies.  This particular one was, "Be careful with the dye; it will stain your clothes."  FB is just growing as I look at him.  He may be taller than I am, but I still outweigh him and age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill.

A sweet faced SoS, belying the devilishness within. 



My parents are in Bend watching my niece race, so the boys and I are on our own for Easter.  I had to get a few things from Target and Al's (just a few unimportant things, like food for lunch and dinner) and both parking lots were insane.  Walking through the stores themselves required some serious navigation skills and more will power than I have ever possessed to not scream "Get the hell out of my way, you freaks!  Why the hell did you wait until the day before Easter to fulfill all your Easter needs anyway."  I was feeling oh, so superior until I walked into Albertson's and, like a beacon from above, I saw this:

Look, I know that it looks like something that should be featured on Cake Wrecks, that the frosting is a hideous shade of green, the Happy Easter is cheap and the flower ring fell off the cake and had to be replaced, but it is surrounded by Peeps!  Peeps, I tell you!  I was destined to have this cake!  It's probably dry as Utah in August, and tastes just as good, but it is ringed in Peeps!  Since I now had an Easter cake, I determined I must  make Easter dinner and became one of the unfortunate shoppers I had earlier been slandering with the most violent curses.  I settled on ham.  Do you know what kind of ham you can buy the day before Easter for Easter dinner?  A freaking big one, that's what kind.  I bought a half of a spiral cut, bone-in (Heh.  Bone-in. Heh heh.  I'd like a bone-in.  Heh heh.) and it is almost 12 pounds.  We are going to be eating ham, ham hash, ham soup, ham sandwiches, you name it, until Christmas.  It reminds me of the first Thanksgiving the BFF made after she divorced the Rat Bastard.  She called me Thanksgiving morning to inform me she had only forgotten one thing...the actual turkey.  All there was left was 25 pound FROZEN turkeys.  We spent all day defrosting it in hot water in the bathtub (it's a wonder we didn't get salmonella) and finally ate the turkey at midnight.  Everything else was eaten at 4.  The turkey was midnight.