28 July 2009


It's hot. Extremely hot for us delicate little temperate zone flowers who thrive at 75 degrees, get tense at 80 and homicidal at 90. Yesterday it was 101 at 5 PM. 5 in the freakin' PM! What did we do? I'll sacrifice a calf if it will relieve the unrelenting heat. Especially since my house was built with "energy saving" construction which means it soaks up the heat all day (no window coverings downstairs after 7 years...okay so some of this is my fault) and has such good insulation it just holds it to its bosom like a addict with her crack pipe. This all serves to make my already delicate temper downright fragile. The kids can't even BREATHE right. The low for last night was 75 degrees at midnight. Oooookaaaay. Fab. I'm just gonna stick ice in my bra and down my pants until this blows over. When we built the house the contractor asked if I wanted to add an air conditioner. I scoffed, "For what purpose? It's hot enough to use for about 3 days." And every summer I kick myself and say, "Jeez, maybe I should just get one installed." And then the three days pass and I'm relieved I didn't spend the money. Until the next summer. And here we are actually having a summer that lasts more than a week and I'm in that same boat. As soon as I decide to pull the trigger, I just know it will start raining and I will have bought an A/C unit at peak season and will be sqealin' from the feelin' for months to come. *sigh* I shouldn't make impulse purchases when I'm mentally ill. And this heat makes me committable. I can't even sleep naked because I have children who have a tendency to worm their way into my bed at all hours. Like at 0400 this morning: SoS crawls next to me and puts his arms and legs over me Me: "WHAT are you doing?" He: "I want to be with you." Me: "You need to go back to your bed." SoS: "But I love you." Me: "I love you too, but you have to get away from me; it's too hot!" Yeah, that won't scar his tender little psyche.

So, The Worst Pirate Song has been in heavy rotation on the iPod in the ol' Planet Killer and I've had to remind SoS that just because the song says "where the hell's your gun?" does not mean it's okay for him to bandy the phrase about at random. And here's another fine song from Ceann that you might enjoy:

I plan on spending tomorrow counting how many tree hugging, Prius lovers flip me off for driving the Planet Killer and causing our own little version of global warming. Excuse me, climate change. I'd hate to be more un-PC than I am already.


  1. You get zero pitty from me! Try 88 as a low for the night. My ac has been on for 3 months already and wont go off for another 4. Talk about killing trees. My ac kills a forest every summer I'm sure.

  2. I feel for ya, I do. This is why I don't live in FL. (Or NC or UT anymore for that matter) But see people who live in that enviroment have AC. I'd gladly wipe out a small planet for some cool air about now.

  3. Ok heres a little trick for ya. We had a couple of hurricanes a few years back that left us w/out power for two weeks at a time. I didnt make it one night without ac much less two before I put the back seats down in our tree killer and we slept in there. Truck running and blissful ac blowin. Soooo bad but soooo good. It helped me keep my sanity.


Okay, GO!